


portrayal

by aspirins



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Art School, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Miscommunication, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-03
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-12 21:59:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13556424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aspirins/pseuds/aspirins
Summary: Jooheon meets Minhyuk, and his inspiration starts there. He never knew it would end so quickly.





	portrayal

There was a moment in Jooheon’s life when he didn’t know Minhyuk, but he couldn’t remember what that was like. From the moment the bright eyed boy walked into his life, Jooheon forgot what the world was like without him.

He never spoke to him, only knowing the name that matched the face because he had been named the winner of last month's creative portrait competition. His work was just as stunning as he was, in Jooheon’s opinion.

Everytime Jooheon caught a glimpse of Minhyuk in the halls at the art school they both frequent every Thursday, he would stop where he was and watch until the black haired boy faded around a corner. There wasn’t a day Jooheon didn’t walk into his class and sketch out a sharp jaw line, a pair of striking brown eyes and struggle to put the beauty he saw in Minhyuk onto a piece of paper.

“You only have another week to turn something in.” Hyungwon whispers, watching Jooheon crumble the drawing and toss it to the side. Jooheon sharpens his pencil, pulls another page out from his book and starts over. He didn’t have a lot of time left, but he did want to turn this picture in his mind into a picture he could present to his teacher. “Who exactly are you trying to draw?”

Jooheon sighs, putting his head in his hands. “Um, just someone I saw. I don’t really know.” Jooheon feels slightly embarrassed, but it wasn’t really that unusual for the students in his class to take inspiration from something around them, people included. 

“The details are vague. Try being more precise.” Hyungwon advises. “You have a face down, but nothing else. That could be anyone. More structure. Are their eyes deep? How many freckles go across their face?” 

The bell rings and Jooheon doesn’t have to look at his watch to know that means it’s seven p.m and another week has gone by where he had nothing. “I don’t know, I really only see him in movement.”

Hyungwon laughs, picking his brushes up and packing them neatly away. “Well, that’s your problem. Why don’t you have him model a few shots for you? Take a few of each angle and reference them. You’re making this harder than it is.”

Jooheon knows he’s right, but before he can tell Hyungwon there’s no way he could gather the courage to even walk up to Minhyuk, he’s pulled away by another student. As they walk out Jooheon shoves his papers and pencils into his bag, frustrated and out of motivation to choose another subject to draw.

He doesn’t even notice his instructor by his side until she speaks.

“Artistic block?” She asks. Jooheon nods. “You have one more week, I have faith in you. Don’t get caught up in the small things. Focus.”

Jooheon nods again, manages a quick thank you, and speed-walks outside the classroom. The door clicks behind him and he takes a moment to survey the empty halls. How could skip the ‘small things’? Everything about Minhyuk screamed out at him, nothing could be left out.

Just as he was leaving the building, a laugh rang out, and Jooheon looked around at the neat empty parking lot. Minhyuk’s face was buried in a pale yellow scarf, and he was laughing. Eyes in a crescent moon, glowing. Jooheon drops his bag and stares a few moments longer before he picks it up.

He’s talking to someone, Hyunwoo it looks like. He had a history class with him every other day. A nice guy, quiet, but charming when he spoke. Minhyuk was giggling with everything Hyunwoo said, and Jooheon felt a little more than left out as he stood ten feet away watching them laugh as the sun set behind them.

Jooheon watches them make their way to a bench, sitting and chatting about something Jooheon couldn’t make out from the distance. From here the shadows from the street light made Minhyuk look mystical. His smile never fading, scarf falling over his shoulder at an angle that made him look like the cover _vogue_.

He felt himself reaching into his bag, sitting where he once stood, and pulling out his sketchbook and paints. He didn’t need a pencil draft, he could almost trace the details of Minhyuk’s face. Jooheon threw pale shades on top of soft yellow ones. Jooheon mimicked the dancing shadows that fell across Minhyuk, mixing light gray with orange to imitate the street light. 

It took fifteen minutes for Jooheon to create what he’d been trying to for the past three weeks. He finishes just in time, adding his signature mark to the bottom of the page just as Hyunwoo says his goodbyes, Minhyuk heading the opposite way.

Jooheon stands up, careful to not touch the painting, and watches Minhyuk fade down the street. It’s cold and Jooheon practically runs to his dorm room, on the other side of campus. 

“Where were you?” Wonho asks as Jooheon makes his way inside. “Whoa! Did you _make_ that?” His roommate almost yells, grabbing the painting from Jooheon. 

“Careful!” Jooheon yells back, taking it from the other and holding it away. “Look, but don’t touch. It’s still wet.” 

Wonho’s eyes travel over the paper and a small smile appears. “It’s good. Really good.” 

Jooheon smiles back, proud. He didn’t want to sound cocky, but he knew it was good. Minhyuk was perfect, and when he was sitting there with his muse right in front of him, he knew he could get it right this time.

“Thanks hyung. It means a lot.” Jooheon says, walking to his room. “Goodnight!”

Jooheon sleeps well, excited to go back to class next Thursday and have something to turn in.

 

\---

 

His alarm goes off at eight a.m and Jooheon groggily gets up, pulling a thick white sweater and a pair of jeans over his body. He wasn’t really in the mood to go to the library, but his biology final was coming up fast and he needed to take the time to study instead of just guessing like he had gotten used to in high school.

University life was very different, and even if his major was in art, he was determined to get good marks in all his courses.

Wonho stops him on his way out the door. “Do you want to come to the salon with me? I’m doing something ...different. Thought you’d want to see it happen.”

Jooheon laughs. “Different? What kind of _different_?”

“Red!”

“What? Seriously?” Jooheon raises a brow. “What made you decide that?”

Wonho smiles and shrugs. “I dunno. Guess I’m just in the mood for a change. So, wanna meet up later? Around four?”

Jooheon nods, “Sure hyung, can’t wait to see it.” Wonho waves him off and Jooheon starts towards the library.

 

He’s seven chapters into his textbook and only half a page into his essay when Jooheon decides to take a quick break around ten. He’s scrolling through instagram on his phone when a familiar laugh enters through the doors.

Minhyuk has an oversized black hoodie on, and his laugh is short lived when the librarian tells him to hush. The people he walked in with head towards the computers, and Minhyuk heads his way. Jooheon looks down, pretending to read the words on his page.

“Bio?” Minhyuk asks, standing next to the table Jooheon was sitting at. 

Was he talking to him? Jooheon looks up. Minhyuk is even prettier this close. Half smile somehow more dazzling than a diamond. Jooheon feels that his mouth has dropped open, but he can’t close it.

“Hello?” Minhyuk asks, a look of concern taking over.

“Uh, what?” Jooheon stutters.

“Bio?” Minhyuk asks again, pointing at the materials spread out on the table. 

“Yes.” Jooheon manages to say. “You too?” Minhyuk nods, pointing to the seat across from him, asking a question without saying a word. “You can sit there.”

Minhyuk smiles and pulls the chair closer to Jooheon. “I hate Mr.Gyu. Essay this, essay that! Where’s the projects?”

Jooheon feels like he’s in a dream. Minhyuk. Lee Minhyuk is sitting at a table with him. And he’s talking to him. _Minhyuk_ is talking to _him_. “HA! Yeah, gotta..gotta hate that guy.” Jooheon says awkwardly. Minhyuk shoots him a weird look, but laughs too.

“You almost done? My class just got the assignment today.” Minhyuk says. Jooheon looks at the papers Minhyuk pulls out from a binder. It’s last weeks assignment.

“Oh, I guess we’re ahead of you.” Jooheon says, pointing at his sheet to show the difference. Minhyuk makes a little “o” with his lips and Jooheon falls a little more in love. 

“Darn, I wanted someone to work with and when I saw your bio book I got my hopes up.” Minhyuk says, apologetic and looking like he was about to stand up.

“I could help you, I just finished anyways.” Jooheon lies. “I remember that paper, I mean, I could tutor you if that’s what you were looking for.”

Minhyuk settles back down, a sweet smile on his face. “If you don’t mind.”

“I don’t.” Jooheon says simply. 

 

Jooheon loses track of time. Between actually getting anything done, and Minhyuk talking him into getting a late lunch at the cafe down the street, Jooheon forgets he needs to be at the salon in a little less than an hour.

“I wish I had a class with you!” Minhyuk says, finishing his sandwich. “I can’t believe we have all the same courses, just different days. Life isn’t fair!”

Jooheon agrees with a nod and a smile, feeling happier than he has in a long time. Minhyuk glances at his phones time, reminding Jooheon of his plans with Wonho. “Does that say three ten?”

Minhyuk nods, “Did you need to be somewhere?” 

“Kind of, well, soonish. Mind if I tutor you more tomorrow?” Jooheon asks. 

Minhyuk gets up, eyes watching Jooheon grab his books. “Sure, it’s a date.” 

Jooheon almost chokes. “A-a date?”

“Yep! Meet me at my dorm around two? I have classes until then.” Minhyuk asks, his usual charming smile in place. Jooheon can’t say yes fast enough. A date. Minhyuk asked him on a date.

“Absolutely.” Jooheon says, already deciding he’ll find a way to skip his _introduction to physics_ class.

They swap numbers and Jooheon rushes to the bus stop and gets a ticket for downtown. The ride is twenty minutes, and the walk is ten, so Jooheon makes it a little early. Just in time to run into Wonho as he walks in.

“Hey! I was just going to call you.” Wonho greats him. “I’m so nervous.”

Jooheon laughs. “Why? It’s not like you can’t just dye it black if you don’t like it.”

“I know...I don’t know, I just hope it looks ok.” 

The stylist starts on Wonho’s hair after a few minutes of waiting. While Wonho makes small talk, Jooheon pulls out his phone and contemplates messaging Minhyuk.

Maybe something playful, like _can’t wait to see you again_? Or should he make it flirty, _wanna grab a movie later tonight?_ Jooheon shook his head at the idea. No, he’d wait. He didn’t want to come off too strong.

Wonho’s hair turns out amazing, and they take about one hundred selfies before leaving the salon.

“Okay, I think that’s enough.” Jooheon whines when they get home.

“It’s never enough. I look so good. Wow, why haven’t I been scouted for modeling yet?” Wonho asks, mirror in hand. Jooheon rolls his eyes and heads to the couch, laying down and pulling out his phone.

The first post on the top of his instagram feed is Wonho’s, and when he refreshes it Minhyuk’s name pops up. The image loads and Jooheon feels his heart drop. It’s Minhyuk's hand, a bigger hand holding onto it. The caption reads: _After class stress reliever <3_. Hyunwoo was tagged.

Jooheon went onto his profile, there were a lot of posts with Hyunwoo, but all the captions seemed friendly at best. Jooheon felt relieved, but still jealous. He wanted to be that close to Minhyuk someday.

Maybe he could show Minhyuk the portrait he made. That would impress him, right? Jooheon smiles to himself. 

 

\---

 

Jooheon texts Minhyuk a half hour before two to ask what dorm he’s in. Minhyuk responds five minutes after and Jooheon only has ten minutes to decide what to wear. A short sleeve? Maybe a band tee. No, a sweater would fit the winter atmosphere better. But what if he got too hot?

He finally settles on a black tee and a bright red _Supreme_ hoodie layered on top. He rushes out the door, having to go back and get the painting when he realizes he forgot it on his desk.

He gets to the dorm five minutes before two, out of breath and full of butterflies. 

“Hey!” Minhyuk answers the door. 

“Hi.” Jooheon says, walking inside and taking in the sight of Minhyuk dressed in nothing but a oversized shirt and boxers. “Um, did I, uh, get here too early?” Jooheon mutters, feeling shy.

Minhyuk sits on the couch, a table in front of him covered in papers. “No, does my casual wear bother you?”

Jooheon shakes his head. “No.”

“What’s that?” Minhyuk asks, changing the subject, Jooheon sets the painting face down.

“A surprise for later. Lets get some work done first.” Jooheon smiles at the puppy pout that appears on Minhyuk’s face.

 

They stay on track for a little over an hour, but Minhyuk has a short attention span, Jooheon is slowly learning, and he convinces Jooheon to take a break. Minhyuk flicks the T.V on, flipping through the channels, aimlessly as he stretches out.

His shirt rides up and Jooheon feels his face get hot, but he can’t look away. 

“Whatcha wanna watch?” Minhyuk asks, snapping Jooheon from his daze.

“You pick.” Jooheon says, too fast. His heart is beating out of his chest when he decides now is a better time than never. “Can I tell you something?” Jooheon chokes on his words a bit, they come out unsure and strange.

Minhyuk looks over. “What is it?”

Jooheon takes a breath. “I think you’re beautiful.” Minhyuk looks stunned. “Since the day I first saw you. The way your eyes shine, how your hair falls in place, the smile that never seems to fade, all of it. All of you.” Jooheon grabs the painting, flipping it over and handing it to Minhyuk.

“It’s amazing.” Minhyuk gasps.

“I love you.” 

Minhyuk tears his eyes from the painting to look up at Jooheon. His eyes are locked on Minhyuk’s. Minhyuk hands the painting back.

“I have a boyfriend.”

Jooheon doesn’t blink. “What?”

“I have...a boyfriend.” Minhyuk looks away. Jooheon doesn’t get a chance to say anything else. The door swings open and Hyunwoo walks in, wearing a familiar black hoodie.

“How’s the study date going?” Hyunwoo asks, cheerful and unaware of the tension in the room.

Jooheon gets up quickly, painting in hand and dashes out the still open door. He hears Minhyuk yell after him, but he doesn’t want to look back.

How could he be so blind? The instagram posts, them always laughing together. He only had himself to blame. In his head he knew Minhyuk did nothing wrong, but that didn’t stop Jooheon’s burning hot rage.

He storms into his dorm, flying past the living room straight to his bedroom. He grabs his sketchbooks, the ones filled with draft, after draft of Minhyuk. He takes them and runs to the bathroom. He throws them all into the tub, twisting the knob until hot water pours over them. The tub slowly fills and Jooheon throws his paints in too. 

Wonho walks in. Doesn’t say anything, just puts his arm around Jooheon as he sobs. They watch the colors blend and swirl together until the water turns muddy. Jooheon lets Wonho calm him down, talks him out of throwing the painting in, telling him to turn it in first. 

Jooheon watches the papers fall apart in the tub, feeling his heart doing the same.

 

\---

 

Hyungwon walks into class, a cold Thursday evening, and takes note of the empty seat beside him.

“Jooheon dropped the class.” The instructor tells Hyungwon after class, when he asks. Hyungwon is surprised. Jooheon had always been passionate about the course, he couldn’t imagine why he would drop it. Hyungwon asks if she knew. “He didn’t say, well, he didn’t speak to me. He left a note on my desk, and his final project for me to grade.”

Hyungwon nods, “Can I see it?” 

“Sure, but I need to be in a meeting, so lock the door when you leave. Mr.Chae.” She says, swiftly leaving. 

Hyungwon walks over to the large oak desk in the corner. He sees a paper that he recognizes as Jooheon’s, and picks it up. It simply reads he’ll be switching courses from creative art to historical art and this will be his final grade. Hyungwon flips it over to reveal the painting.

It’s of the front of the building, Hyungwon notices. It’s dark out, a single bench is lit by a glowing orange light. A person sits in the middle, but Hyungwon can’t tell who, someone scribbled over the face with marker.

Nevertheless, it was beautiful.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm trash for joohyuk so someone tell me why i can't make a happy fic for them???? idk i just really wanted to make something short between working on my longer fic that is to come out (it ends happy for minhyuk so look forward to that!) so i sat down, listened to sad piano covers, and this is what happened over the last few hours
> 
> let me know what you think!!


End file.
